Relationship Goals: How to Win at Dating, Marriage, and Sex by Michael Todd came out of a sermon series at Transformation Church in Tulsa that was watched millions of times online. WaterBrook published the book and it went to number one on the New York Times bestseller list.
The listing this page links to is the audiobook, published by Random House Audio, narrated by Ameen Gaines, running about five hours and fifty minutes. If you want print, check the listing before you order. Todd narrates neither, which is worth knowing since the book is so clearly built out of preaching.
What it covers
Todd works through dating, marriage, and sex in that order, and the ordering is the argument. His case is that most people are trying to succeed at stage three while having skipped the work of stage one, and that the reason relationships keep failing is not bad luck but a bad sequence.
He is direct about sex, more so than most church published books, and that is deliberate. His view is that vagueness from the pulpit is why people learn about sex from everywhere except church. Readers who prefer euphemism will find this uncomfortable.
He is also unusually candid about his own marriage and his own failures before it. That honesty is a large part of why the book connected.
Where Todd comes from
Transformation Church is a charismatic, non denominational megachurch, and Todd preaches in that tradition. Readers from more reserved backgrounds will notice the style: high energy, a lot of memorable phrases, illustrations that land hard. He is a communicator first.
On the substance of this book, the teaching is fairly mainstream. He holds a traditional Christian sexual ethic, argues for waiting, and is serious about marriage as a covenant. There is nothing exotic in here doctrinally.
The honest criticism
Preaching and books are different crafts, and this reads like preaching. The catchphrases that work in a room can feel thin on the page. The arguments move by illustration rather than by careful reasoning, and there is a fair amount of repetition, which is normal in a sermon series and less welcome in print.
If you want depth, this is not deep. If you want somebody to grab your attention and hold it long enough to change how you think about dating, it does that well.
The companion products
There are two other titles under this name and they are separate purchases: a Relationship Goals Study Guide and Relationship Goals Challenge: Thirty Days from Good to Great. The thirty day challenge is its own book. If you saw that feature described somewhere as part of the main book, it is not.
Who it is for
Single men who want a Christian frame for dating that is not either fearful or vague. Younger men especially. Couples dating seriously. It is also an easy book to hand to someone who does not read much, which is a real advantage.
Bottom line
Popular, readable, honest, and light on depth. Good as a starting point and a conversation opener, not as the last word.
Find Relationship Goals on Amazon.