Be a Man!: Becoming the Man God Created You to Be opens by talking about death. Not gently, either. You are going to die, you will give an account of your life, so what exactly are you doing with it. Fr. Larry Richards does not spend a chapter warming you up first.
That is the register of the whole book, and it is why men keep handing it to each other.
A note before you buy it: this is a Catholic book. Richards is a Catholic priest and Servant Books is a Catholic imprint, so the sacraments, confession, and Catholic devotional practice appear throughout as normal parts of the Christian life. CalledToBetter is non-denominational evangelical. We found nothing in it that conflicts with what we hold, and we are recommending it. You should just know whose bookshelf it came from.
Who wrote it
Richards pastors an inner-city parish in Erie, Pennsylvania. He hosts a daily national radio show on Relevant Radio, founded The Reason for Our Hope Foundation, and is one of the most requested speakers on the men’s conference circuit.
He is not writing from a study. He is writing from four decades of hearing what men actually confess.
What it does well
The central argument is that your identity is settled before you do anything: you are a beloved son of God, and everything else follows from accepting that rather than earning it. Richards keeps returning to it because he thinks most men’s problems downstream are really this problem upstream.
He is unusually honest about his own failures, including his relationship with his own father. Nothing here is delivered from above the reader.
He is also blunt about sin in a way that has gone out of fashion. He wants men to name what they are actually doing rather than manage the appearance of being fine. For a man who has learned to present well, that is uncomfortable and useful.
He addresses the reader as “gentlemen” throughout, which reads oddly on the page and works because he clearly means it.
Honest notes
The previous version of this review said the book is built around “ten essential characteristics” of a man of God and described checkboxes to tick off as you complete tasks. I could not verify either claim. Check the Amazon preview if the structure matters to you.
That review also quoted a CalledToBetter review team discussing the book in small groups. There was no team, and that has been removed. The post also carried no tags at all.
Fair warning on the tone: Richards is direct to the point of abrasive, and some men find it bracing while others find it a lecture. Read a sample and see which you are.
Who should read it
A man who is tired of being encouraged and would rather be told the truth. Anyone who has drifted into a comfortable, unexamined faith. Catholic men, for whom this is squarely aimed and very well done. Protestant men who do not mind reading across the line and sorting as they go.
Skip it if you want gentleness, or a book that shares your theological framework on every page without you having to think about it.